The Pill

Shuvo Shams
4 min readMar 2, 2022


Stay strong, Zeus

That was what I remember when I woke. I did not remember her name just the words.

We all were brought up to live this one day perfectly. And we did when the time came. But the time came after twenty-two years of education. Our role was to live the one day perfectly. And until we did so we would go back in time to the same day.

These were discarded memories often left by ourselves. When the day came to a close. We had to make sure we took the pills or else we would die.

In the time-world each of our jobs was defined, each of our seconds defined, and we were given unlimited tries to live it perfectly. And we were supported by pills that were supposed to help us get through the day.

The pills were red and yellow and black. It came to us in a package when we graduated alongside our one-day assignment. Mine was to deliver a letter to Mr Grim.

I had no idea about Mr Grim but I guess my first day was that of a messenger. So that is what I did . I woke up at 6 am. The first of my trial days. I went out after taking the red pill. My senses shaped I had to go to the roundabout at the end of the station where someone who will meet me. I am so excited to meet anyone. Or perhaps its the pill. I cannot tell

I went to the corridor of the ballroom where everyone seems to start their journey. I got my letter. This was to be opened when I ended the mission, and it wasn't the letter I was to deliver.

I asked no question, questions are forbidden, it was a test, if I falter if I did not move as I was trained to it will trigger a reset. And I can't afford a reset. I guess this hibi-jibi letter is proof I messed up before. It shouldn't be here.

But it was.

Anyway I took my coat, I felt strange as if I recognised my coat, it was nice, it probably means I have worn this coat before. I walked straight through the door, it was a brisk walk till I saw it was autumn outside. The trees were shedding their beautiful leaves, it was all orange around me. It felt unfamiliar though.

I wonder what it means.

I walked to the corner and I met a woman aged the same as me, she told me to take out the blue pill. I did. Then we went to her home. We took our clothes off. And then she started sucking me. It was quite pleasurable, then she went told me to have sex with her. I obliged, and we had 17 minutes of pleasure.

But my body felt wrong and uninspired, it was supposed to be fun. Perhaps I did it before perhaps I failed here. But she seemed to tell me to go ahead and take the last pill after I delivered the letter.

She told me she would name our son Cronos. I was happy but I knew this feeling too. Have I had a son before, that wasn't possible in one day of existence. Perhaps this promise was as old as my failures.

So I went outside and had my lunch in a cafe outside, it was Autumn, I wanted to live in this autumn world, I gazed at a tree as it flung side by side and dangled till it fell. Its veins were like tributaries. It was beautiful. Perhaps I have seen this so many times too. But it didnt feel old.

I went to the man, the letter was in my pocket, and when I reached him. I handed it to him. He ripped the letter in front of me, and told me to wait.

I waited and he came back with a gun in his hand, but I wasn't afraid for some reason. I must have seen something like this before. He put told me to report it and then take the last pill when I went back.

And then he shot himself, first in the left leg, screaming and then as blood gushed out he sat in the chair and put the gun towards his head and he died. I wasn't even shocked, this must be really natural. I must have seen this before.

I went back to my hotel room, filed the report. And I opened the letter

It told me to take the last pill. The last pill was supposed to erase my memory.

But I…

But I…

Needed this memory

The falling autumn leaves,

I needed to remember this. My son is named Cronos. How can I forget this?

It was time to take the pill.

It was one minute left.

So I drafted this letter to me,

And I took the pill,

Perhaps the 100th time?

Perhaps the thousandth.

If we had to live one day perfectly I dont know how many tries we needed.

I just know that I needed to get through this to start the next day.

I woke up

I remember someone told me stay strong Zeus, I did not remember her name just the words



Shuvo Shams

Trying really hard to have one epiphany at a time in this dystopia.